Brother in Testing

I got some bad news about my brother Gary. He does have HD. We
found out on Thursday. He is 23 and has been showing signs since
he was 21. He is more symptomatic than me. It breaks my heart
right now. You don’t ever want to see your family members have it
too? At least I gave him some hope. We need to do something to
make everything better for our future. We need to make this the
last generation with HD. I always wanted to be the only one in my
family who has it. I would take everything to save my family. Now
there are 3 of us that have it. There is my brother Scotto that has
left to be tested.

Another new possible cure

The second breakthrough for the year. What did I say. Will
hopefully have a cure in the next few years.
http://www.medicalimagingmag.com/reuters_article.asp?id=20071009drgd001.html

Possible New HD Treatment

The first big breakthorugh of the year.
http://www.reuters.com/article/pressRelease/idUS106311+07-Jan-2008+BW20080107

Scarred

I am feeling way better today. I have fought the depression and now
I am healed. Yesterday I was so scared. You would not think that a
Teddy Bear hallucination would be so scary. I had several auditory
hallucinations. I kept going to sleep and waking up and seeing
giant Teddy Bears. I kept grounding myself by grabbing my Hubby’s
arm. It does work grounding yourself into reality. I just try to shrug
this illness off and not let it get to me. The fight for happiness is all I
contend with everyday. We need it. The big word Hope. Whenever I
have and episode like that I never ever lose hope. I am not going to
die. You are not going to die. I do believe in miracles and they come
in the form of cures. We are already so close I can see them
already.

Fight With Everything You Got

I have been fighting off a serve depression for the past 4 days.
There have been some painful things happening. I want to give the
parties privacy. Even though my counselor said blog about it. I have
been fighting off negative and paranoid thoughts. When I went
snowshoeing I actually thought someone was going to kill me.
Weird right? I go through periods with HD where the symptoms get
worse and worse. I have to fight harder when theses hard days
come. We have to fight harder. It is way better to feel happy and
alive instead of down, right? We have it so much harder than
anyone could understand. Just trying to smile is a hard
accomplishment for someone who has it. I will never give into the
mood swings, the depression. the anxiety. the paranoia. I won’t let
this take over me. We don’t need to feed it. It will just get worse.
Always need to fight. Happiness is way worth the fight. Always keep
fight even though it gets too hard to handle. Never ever give into it.

Worrying

My blog was down for an hour. I am glad it is now back up. To get
back to yesterdays post. We can’t let worry take over our lives. Let it
control our lives. Take away all of our reason. I have HD. They are
lots of worries that I have too. It is a fight to stop worrying. I am such
worrier though. It does us no good at all. Like I said yesterday it is a
disease. It is one that unlike HD. We can actually cure and work on
healing ourselves. Worrying excessively leads to worse things. Try
not to let anything get to you. Put up a wall to let all of the worry
penetrate it. Worrying gets was into a worse state then we think.
We need to fight it so badly. Just accept every change. That is one
of the ways to live with HD. Accept it. There is nothing that we can
change about it. The sooner we can accept we can move on. With
lfe pure and simple